Big Mistake

We had breakfast this morning at Cianci, the charming European bistro that just happens to be located on Main Street in New Jersey. Our waiter Mike is leaving in a few weeks to return to college in Boston. Mike is terrific and attentive and polite and one can't help wishing him well so I decided to give him a piece of unsolicited advice.

"Make some mistakes," I said.

The biggest mistake young people make is being afraid of making mistakes. Back in the old days it was perfectly acceptable to blow it, screw up, get a C grade as long as it was in the pursuit of some passionate enterprise. Not today...today my young coaching clients have been so programmed that when they leave the so-called safety of university life they feel as though they've been pushed out of a plane without a parachute. As the good Doctor W. would say, "they're two inches from the floor but it feels like two hundred feet."

There are lots of situations where mistakes should not be tolerated but taking a difficult class or seeking a job in a field that may not pay off but piques the interest should not fall under that heading.

Many of my coaching clients haven't made a mistake in their life. Big mistake. The little errors, the small roadblocks are excellent preparation for the curveballs life tends to throw you.

So go ahead...fail at something. Blow it completely and watch how your world doesn't splinter, your friends don't abandon you, the sun still comes up and goes down. As Kate Monster sings in "Avenue Q"..."And you never know 'til you reach the top if it was worth the uphill climb."